CONFLICT

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Conflict is inevitable. No two people will agree on everything. In fact, we sometimes even disagree with ourselves. Family conflict can be defined as a situation where two or more family members believe their desires are incompatible with those of others. A key difference between a healthy and unhealthy family lies in how they handle and resolve conflict.

In Genesis 13:1-12, Abram provides a great example of how to handle family conflicts. When we come to Genesis 13, God instructs Abram to leave his homeland and go to Canaan. Abram, Sarai, and his nephew Lot settle in Canaan until a famine forces them to move to Egypt. In the passage, Abram, Lot, and their households return to Canaan from Egypt and settle between Bethel and Ai. Both Abram and Lot were blessed with great possessions, including an abundance of livestock. However, because the land was not sufficient to support both Abram’s and Lot’s herds, a conflict arose between their herdsmen.

Some conflicts can be resolved by placing the interests of others ahead of our own (see Philippians 2:3-4).

• Keep The Big Picture In Mind. Abram realized that being family was more important than winning an argument. When we disagree, do we focus so much on proving our point that we miss the big picture?
• Seek A Solution Early. Often, we wait until something gets on our last nerve before addressing the issue, which makes the conflict worse than if we had addressed it earlier.
• Follow Up On The Issue once a solution is reached or when an agreement is made that there isn't a viable solution at the moment. This follow-up helps ensure the solution is working and prevents recurring conflicts.
• Listening Is Key To Defusing Conflict. It helps clarify and focus on the issues being discussed. When we listen, we are not focused on proving our point, but on understanding the other person (James 1:19).